may partake in National Sorry Day.

thirteen ways of saying i'm sorry

after stevens

I

1985, korea

in august.

you still named me sunshine.

i'm sorry if i ruined your life

but you saved mine.

II

banana slugs, misty

gray air, and shores of driftwood:

i'm sorry i forget more

and more of you each day.

III

i'm sorry; i would have loved

to meet you.

IV

i tell people i do not

like the taste of gin.

the truth is

i am reminded of you, summer

nights, and the pine scent of your tongue.

i'm sorry, i should not

lie.

V

frag

mented syl

lables

crushed f

or

m

i'm so

rry y

our brain an

d mine

can't com

municate.

VI

i like to think

after four years together

that we didn't talk about marriage,

babies, money, and "what if" not

because we didn't want a shared future

but because the present was more than enough.

i'm sorry i didn't thank you

for each and every day

we spent together, happy.

VII

i'm sorry:

"o my people, what have i done unto thee"

sounds like an oops.

VIII

i should never have let you

marry him-- i'm sorry.

IX

maybe because your hair is soft

maybe because you smell like a morning shower at 11 pm

maybe because my hands fit inside yours

maybe because you giggle when i kiss you

maybe it's all the little things

that make me sorry

i wanted you more

than you wanted me.

X

crunchy green peppers

extra packet of spicy sauce

clumps of hamburger--

i'm sorry

your home-cooked chili

just doesn't compare

to wendy's.

XI

sometimes i wake up in the middle

of the night and wonder

if you just got up to use the bathroom.

in the dark,

i remember you

are not there,

you chose not to be there,

and you will never be there.

i force myself back

to sleep before the deep ache

in my chest causes any more tears

to

fall.

i'm sorry

you won't be here to hold me.

XII

i'm sorry your failures

make me feel accomplished.

XIII

daunting mobile of words

and phrases dangle

i no

longer know

if they are mine

or yours.

i'm sorry

if my imitation

is the only way

i can connect

with greatness.